Perfectly Imperfect

So, my last semester of nursing school has started. I am two weeks in and I already feel incredibly overwhelmed! Lately I have felt like I am being stretched at thin as I possibly can. I know when I get this way, I need to rely on God more than I do when all feels right with the world. Don't get me wrong, I ALWAYS need to rely on God, I absolutely cannot do this life without Him. Right now, however, I need Him more than ever. Not only do I know this, but the evil one knows this as well. Satan is doing whatever he can to make sure I DON'T spend enough time with my Father. That guy really grinds my gears. God has shown me that I have been trying to do this semester by myself so far, and God is showing me my need for Him every second of the day.

He's been showing me a lot of things lately. For example, I hold myself to a high standard that I can't meet. Because I don't want to disappoint God, that standard becomes perfection. I want everyone and everything around me to work perfectly, for all the working gears of my life to run smoothly, without rust, and without squeaking. The fact of life here on earth is that there will always be thunderstorms and rain to make those gears rust, squeak, and break down. Basically, God is showing me that I will never be perfect, and that I need to stop expecting my life to fall into perfection. The only thing that is perfect is our God, and He has every single detail worked out in my life. His will is perfect. His word is without flaws. He has made me in His image and even though I am not perfect, I am valuable. I am worth something. He loves me enough to be patient with me... to pick me up every single time I fall... to pursue me when my actions show there are other things worth pursuing besides Him. He will never let me go, and when I run back to Him, He will always welcome me with open arms. Oh praise the One who paid my debt and raised this life up from the dead!!!!

Everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For His sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ and become one with Him. I no longer count on my own righteousness through obeying the law; rather, I become righteous through faith in Christ. For God's way of making us right with Himself depends on faith. I want to know Christ and experience the mighty power that raised Him from the dead. I want to suffer with Him, sharing in His death so that one way or another I will experience the resurrection from the dead! -Philippians 3:8-11